


changes

by liare



Category: Anne of Green Gables (TV 1985) & Related Fandoms, Anne with an E (TV)
Genre: Adulthood, Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, Emotional Talks, F/M, Marriage, Period-Typical Sexism, no beta we die like men, this is based on a storyline from the books but w a character from awae
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-16
Updated: 2019-08-16
Packaged: 2020-09-02 10:08:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20274193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liare/pseuds/liare
Summary: Of course Anne wants to marry Gilbert. She loves him, more than anything. But there’s more.or: Cole and Anne talk about what marriage means for her as a woman and a teacher.





	changes

Every time Cole sees Anne, something changes. The hairstyle, the brooch, the perfume... but she always stays the same. She never truly changed. 

She’s just grown. 

She really does carry herself like a _teacher_ now; her hair’s almost too neat to match the fashions, posture straight, exemplary. Cole can clearly distinguish Miss Stacy’s influence, too, from the little smile that never leaves Anne’s face to her _trousers_ \- though if he didn’t know better, he’d think it’s just a pleated skirt. 

It’s not surprising, really. He’s seen women less discreet about it; but Anne’s not a Parisian bohemian, he supposes. She’s got a reputation to live up to - a teacher, proper role model, soon-to-be _wife_. 

Having finished her tea, Anne speaks up. “What’s got you smiling?” Cole looks up and sees it hidden beneath Anne’s smile. Worry. 

He puts away a book he never realised he was holding and leans in. “Nothing... just thinking.”

“About...?”

Cole’s quiet for a minute before he leans back in his armchair again. “You in a white dress... so, so soon,” he says with a wide grin. It falls right after Anne’s face does. “Oh- is something wrong? Did he-“

She smiles weakly - but her eyes are on her lap. She’s fiddling with her engagement ring. “Oh, it’s not Gil. He’s a darling, really. It’s everyone else.”

“Someone in particular troubling you?”

Anne chuckles, adjusting the ring and finally looking up. “No. That’s the problem, actually. It’s no one _in particular._” Cole’s known Anne for long enough to know she’s uncomfortable. Sad, even. “Do you... sometimes wish you lived in another time?”

She sees confusion melt into understanding on Cole’s face. “All the time,” he whispers, giving Anne a soft, encouraging smile. 

He knows she isn’t talking about the times of knights and romance like she used to. They both mean a time, a _world_ they keep being promised, but never seems to come. 

“Why must being a wife and a teacher be mutually exclusive?” 

Cole still sees a headstrong girl he used to know in this distinguished woman - fighting for what she believes in, not giving in, never giving up. She must miss those times, with Marilla - with _Matthew_ \- in Avonlea. When the world was at her feet and adulthood’s - _womanhood’s_ expectations were far away. 

Anne looks up to the ceiling - so splendidly painted - and groans. It’s not what a woman - a teacher and a wife - should do, but Cole giggles. “I just- I wish I could keep both Gil and the children at school. But it’s wrong of me not to turn to housekeeping. I’ve put it off long enough, I’m twenty six!” 

“Maybe... maybe you don’t have to get married-“ 

Everything becomes quiet for a while, as Anne’s expressions change; from temptation through consideration to fear. “No- that’s... Maybe if we lived in... Paris. But we don’t. This is PEI-“ she whispers. “And there’s nothing in the universe I want more than to live with him.” 

“I mean... You don’t have to be married to do that?” 

_Maybe in another time._ “That would be... outrageous. Who would want their children to be taught by a woman of such scandal - I absolutely cannot do that,” she exclaims, appalled, and yet so dreamful. There’s a long silence - of understanding and empathy and pity - between them before Anne speaks up, voice shaking and face confident. “I’ve known for three years... _since the beginning_ that this moment would come. I’m horrified because it’s coming so soon and I’m scared that I’ll never get used to homemaking-“ 

“Anne.” 

She buries a hand in the hairdo that must have taken an eternity to make. “Oh, I am _convinced_ I’ll make a terrible wife!” 

Cole grabs Anne’s hand and runs his thumb over her engagement ring. “It really is beautiful, you know?” 

She looks up, startled and perhaps confused, just to meet Cole’s eyes. They’re warm and comforting, in a way. “Anne. If I know one thing, it’s that Gilbert makes you happy.” 

Cole squeezes her hand. “Look at this ring. He didn’t give it to you because he wanted a wife to cook him dinner or to carry his children. He gave it to you because he loves you. He loves you, he always has, and he _won’t care_ if you don’t dust the shelves. This whole marriage thing, it’s new to him, too, you know?” 

Anne opens her mouth. She never looks him right in the eye, something going on inside her head. “I mean... Do you think so?” Cole nods a couple times. “I love him too, and... I just want everything to be perfect.” 

“I’m sure he does, too. You’ll learn together. I promise.” 

Anne smiles and squeezes Cole’s hand, now playing with his rings. “I just... I know that you’re right, Cole, but it still breaks my heart to leave the children. Yet, I have to marry. And of all men, I want to marry Gilbert, to make a home with him... I just wish to be teacher and wife, not teacher or wife.” 

There’s a long pause, Anne breathing heavily and on the verge of tears. She’s never said it aloud, never really allowed herself to think about it. And now, it feels real. That for the rest of her life, she’ll just be a wife and, perhaps, a mother. 

Cole’s deep in thought, too, it seems; his eyes are closed, a bit like when he would scream “Come to me, muse!” as a teenager. But they’re adults now. 

“You and I, we were born in the wrong time,” he starts, playing with his other hand on his lap. “But look at all the women fighting around the globe; look at New Zealand or Australia.” He finally looks up at Anne, and even though his face looks sad, there’s pride in his glistening eyes. “And you played, you _still play_ such a huge role in all this... by giving all those little Canadian girls an education. They’ll change the world one day, all thanks to you.” 

Cole wipes a tear from Anne’s face before taking her other hand. “What if you and Gilbert raise daughters that won’t have to choose? We weren’t lucky, but the world is changing.” 

“It truly is,” Anne chuckles in between tears. “And it always will, won’t it?” 

“All you can do now, Anne, all you _have to do_ is be happy. Even in this world. Even in this time.” 

**Author's Note:**

> and so ends my first fic for the awae fandom !!! ive found this in my drafts and remembered that i actually loved this storyline when reading the books. and who doesn’t love anne and cole’s friendship!
> 
> also, just to clarify, im a fashion history FREAK, and by a pleated skirt i didn’t mean what we have today !!! i actually meant VERY wide pleats that some skirts back then had:)
> 
> please leave kudos or (even an emoji in the) comments - it means the world to me !! also please talk to me on twitter : @/subiektywizm <33


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